WellnessWithHolli

With the holiday season upon us, it is easy to feel anxious and stressed. There is much to do and not enough time to do it in. In addition, with worries around the costs of gift-giving and travel as well as meeting family expectations, our joy begins to slip away. To add to the tension of the holidays, stores are crammed with pushy shoppers and streets are filled with impatient drivers. Gosh, no wonder with each passing day, we feel more agitated and less appreciative of the season. Let’s take a look at how we navigate a happier and healthier mindset during Holiday Turbulence. 3 Easy Practices For Staying Balanced! Breathe and Hold Suspend Beliefs Be In The Moment Let’s begin with our first practice. Breathe and Hold You’ve probably heard about the importance to taking deep breaths when dealing with stress or anxiety. However, we’re going to change it up a little.   The exercise is as follows: 1) When you feel mad, tense, anxious, irritable etc., close y

I thought it was hard raising my daughter in the 80's and 90's.  Of course, there were challenges, but my heart goes out to parents and guardians who are currently raising children. I think it is much more difficult and dangerous today. Why? Two reasons. First, our children's degree of access and exposure to and consumption of anything  has increased exponentially, especially to technology. Secondly, social normative behaviors have conditioned us into believing that if we don't go with the flow, our children will miss out.  Let's examine how responsible adults can navigate the Parent Tech Trap and find answers to the question, "How Do I Know What Is Best For My Children?"                                                                         Who I Am Matters.  What I Do As A Parent or Guardian Matters.                                                                                            In answering the question "How do I know what is b

How To Respond When Someone Is Hurting: 3 Do's and 3 Don’ts It is really difficult to know how to respond when someone is hurting.   Whether an individual has experienced a recent death or a traumatic event, or is struggling with painful relationships or serious health issues, we often find ourselves saying the wrong thing or not saying anything at all for fear of saying the wrong thing. And yet, most of us want to be a source of comfort. Let’s take a look at how to respond when someone is hurting. Although there is much to say on this topic, for our purposes let’s consider implementing “3 Do's and 3 Don’ts.” First Do: Short Statements. Be Still and Listen. Offer Yourself This First Do is so simple. Gently approach an individual and begin with two short statements. 1) Acknowledge your understanding of the situation.     Example: “I recently found out that your uncle passed away.”   2) Express your emotion. Keep it short and sincere..     Examp

We are having a discussion about Healthy Families. If you are new to this series, please return to  Part One Healthy Families: Is Mine Free of Entanglements? , and  Part Two Healthy Families: Is Mine Flexible? Then join us here. We are examining families as a “system.” In other words,   families are like complex moving machines   where each individual is an integral   and interdependent part to its overall level of functioning and wellbeing. Today, we move to Part Three Healthy Families: Is Mine For-Giving? Any system functions well when there is a shared mindset of For-Giving. We are not talking about the   traditional definitions of forgiveness when one party pardons, excuses, or absolves another.   We are talking about an intentional interplay between family members in which each person is responsible for the wellbeing of the system by implementing three behaviors. Families are healthy when they share a mindset of For-Giving: To Self To Others To A Process

We are having a discussion about Healthy Families . If you are new to this series, please return to Part One: Healthy Families - Is Mine Free of Entanglements? , and then join us here. We are examining families as a “system.” In other words,   families are like complex moving machines where each individual is an integral   and interdependent part to its overall level of functioning. Today, we move to Part Two Healthy Families: Is Mine Flexible? Flexible means to be able to change or adapt with ease. Flexible families tend to move through turbulence embracing an adaptive posture and stabilizing it in the process.  Let’s explore two areas of flexibility: Elastic Energize Elastic In defining a family system, elastic means the following: One which has the ability to stretch,    bend, or flex beyond its previously defined stasis. Read again, aloud. One which has the ability to stretch,   bend, or flex beyond its previously defined stasis. Hea

After posting a   three-part series on  Healthy Friendships and receiving positive feedback, I’m returning to the same format but this time exploring Healthy Families. There is much to be said on this topic; in fact, there are hundreds of books with tons of valuable information.   However, for our purposes we will focus on three aspects of Healthy Families: Part One: Is Mine Free of Entanglements? Part Two: Is Mine Flexible? Part Three: Is Mine For-Giving? As we get started, I’d like to share an important concept. As a Marriage & Family Therapist, when working with families I view them as a sort of working machine, based on the theory of Family Systems. In other words, a family is   made up of many moving parts (individuals). How well each part functions determines the level of functionality of the machine as a whole, much like that of a vehicle. Therefore, in addressing Healthy Families, I’d like you to think about your family as an intricate and interdependent work