WellnessWithHolli

Amidst an escalating environment of anger, blame, and chaos of the past several years, folks are hesitate  to turn on the TV, or view their Facebook page, or see what is trending on Twitter. Although we want to stay informed, many of us feel overwhelming sadness over the ongoing traumas such as environmental disasters, mass shootings, and chronic political turmoil which  are continually being replayed, re-tweeted, re-posted, etc. And with a cloud of anxiety hovering over us, we are wondering when the next tragedy is going to happen and how folks will cope. Cautiously surfing through the TV stations one evening, I stumbled across a calm rational news contributor who reported on the "collective trauma" we are all experiencing. She acknowledged that although the recent as well as past political divisions and crises, combined with the plethora of killings and devastating hurricanes, fires, and earthquakes which have become almost a "norm" in our society, familiarity ...

Today's blog is for mature audiences: ages 18 and over. Today's conversation is not an easy one to have, but it is critical.  What I am about to share may seem exaggerated and even fabricated.  Tragically, it is not. In the words of Susan Marine (Former Associate Dean of Student Life at Harvard University), "Sexual violence has always been part of the college experience" . We know this to be an accurate statement from studies conducted on "campus violence at our universities and colleges" which date as far back as 1987 (CNN Films, The Hunting Ground ). Before I offer you 3 Key Strategies for Protecting Our Youth Against Campus Sexual Assault, it is important to understand that the recent case at Stanford University (in which an accomplished swimmer was convicted of sexual assault against a female student) is one of thousands which occur each year in the United States.Today, one out of four female college students will be a victim of rape or sexual assau...

Over the past several weeks, we have been talking about a very debilitating injury - betrayal. To gain a better understanding of betrayal and the recovering information we've covered, I encourage you to read the previous blogs before moving ahead:  Blindsided by the Betrayal Bandit? (1) Hold on...help is on the way!!  ; (2) What is behind the mask? ;  (3) Feeling "Confused, Worthless and Powerless"?  ; and (4) Free yourself from four painful traps!   Today, we will tackle our last blog in this series, but it is perhaps the most important one - understanding why injury from betrayal hurts so badly.  When we can make sense of why we are feeling incredible pain,  or when we come to learn that there are sound explanations for the debilitating  states  we find ourselves in, an inner level of comfort takes hold and our healing begins. Let's examine two features of betrayal which explain why we hurt so badly.  #1 Underlying...

The month of May brings with it "Mother's Day". For many it is a day of loving remembrance and celebration of mothers who created, nurtured, and protected their children. In preparing to write my blog for this special occasion, I found myself wondering what to write. What could I offer readers that I had not written about or that they had not read already? How could I encourage or inspire mothers, fathers, and their children? And then, I thought about my daughter, my role as a mother, and The Power of a Promise. The Power of a Promise Growing up in a chaotic and unhealthy environment, I did not understand what was going on around me. Issues of addiction and anger plagued our family and escalated over time. As our family grew, my mother became more emotionally absent, physically negligent, and psychologically unwell. Most of the time, I felt afraid and alone. By the time I was eleven, I no longer felt safe. By the time I was eleven, I made myself a promise -  ...

We have been exploring an all-to-common and painful topic- injury from betrayal. If you have not had a chance, please read our first three blogs in this series:  Help Is On The Way ,  What Is Behind The Mask?  , and  Feeling Confused, Worthless, and Powerless?  I want you to know that you are not alone in what you are experiencing. And just as importantly, by understanding what you are feeling and why, you begin the journey of recovering. Today, we are going to tackle a challenging topic - Blindsided by the Betrayal Bandit? Free Yourself From Four Painful Traps!  When we are betrayed,  it is our instinct to search outside ourselves for answers, for truth,  and for some measure of control over our lives. Sadly, doing so lengthens our stay in the pain-field.                                                       ...

We have been discussing betrayal. If you have not already done so, please read the previous two blogs to help you get acquainted with the Betrayal Bandit -  Blindsided by the Betrayal Bandit? Hold on...Help is on the way. and  Blindsided by the Betrayal Bandit? What is behind the mask?  Today, we are going to tackle some really important information - Blindsided by the Betrayal Bandit? And feeling "Confused, Worthless, and Powerless"?  If you answered yes to any of these three feelings, read on.  You are not alone!  In fact, if you have been betrayed, you can expect to navigate through three debilitating and painful states: The State of Confusion... The State of Worthlessness... The State of Powerlessness Let's find out what is going on and why we are feeling this way! Let's get started. #1 - State of Confusion  When we are first betrayed, we enter into a State of Confusion.  Yes, we are in shock. And we are often in denial. ...