WellnessWithHolli

With the news coverage of the  secrecy and silence surrounding a plethora of sexual assault cases within a "closed system" (a USA gymnastics organization and a university) , it is important to revisit steps for   Proactive Parenting  in the protection of children and in the advocacy of victims. Taking Back My Life - People Magazine, Feb.19, 2018 For the purposes of today's  blog, we are going to focus on  Proactive Principle #2.  Visit  Proactive Parenting (full blog)   for  Proactive Principle #1 .  Tragically, because of on-going sexual assaults of students on our college campuses and universities, examples and statistics will be incorporated to illustrate specific concepts and principles. Proactive Parenting Principle #2    is a tough one - rarely discussed but critically important. Again, integrate it into your mindset and apply it to your parenting style. Here we go. Let's look at how we can protect our children a...

What I am about to share is based solely on anecdotal experience and observation.  Nothing more. My husband Dan and I recently returned from a vacation to parts of Western Europe and the Mediterranean. Thrilled to have an opportunity to share places I had visited as a college student and then as an adult, I couldn't wait to explore the wonders of other cultures with the love of my life! And, he was just as excited to experience it for the first time. Arriving first in Paris, we set out to visit as many of the tourist attractions as we could fit in during our stay there. In spite of the untimely heat wave, we did just that.  But because Dan and I are "foodies", we reserved our meal times for sleuthing out specialty restaurants and boutique cafe's nestled between quaint shops and greeted by cobblestone streets.  One afternoon, we stumbled across La Saotico - a gem of a restaurant. After being warmly welcomed by the owner, we made ourselves comfortable while s...

Last time we learned what is means to be codependent, and we examined  a couple of reasons as to why we are codependent. I want to stress that codependents are really caring, good people.  This is a strength! However, it becomes a weakness when we over-invest into others to the degree that we are spent! I also want to impress upon codependents that knowledge is power.  By understanding  what is going on with us and why, our healing begins!   Let's get started with two steps as we answer the question - Now what do I do? Shift in Thinking! First step - Shift in  thinking or mindset . This  may sound obvious but in order to begin your healing, it is critical that you make a shift in your thinking or mindset - acknowledging that what you are doing isn't working for you! If you still believe that you are responsible for saving someone else and that if you stop doing what you are doing, the other person won't make it on his/her own, you probably are n...

I could not let this month go by without paying tribute to all the women - and men - who have Bravely Fighting Breast Cancer fought or who are bravely confronting their battles with Breast Cancer. I feel so encouraged that in my lifetime, I have witnessed incredible support, attention, and financial resources being directed towards early detection, effective treatments, and finding a cure for Breast Cancer. Indeed, amazing strides have been made. At the same time, women and men -and their loved ones - continue to be affected by this insidious disease. With the diagnosis of Breast Cancer  or when an individual receives a life –threatening or life-altering diagnosis – of any kind - each person responds or reacts in different ways .  There are so many variables at play such as age and overall health issues, family members and their ages, financial resources and means, professional constraints, and personalities, just to name a few. And of course, there is the fear and unc...

Domestic Violence is one of the themes of Awareness for this month . Sometimes, I feel like it is an issue that doesn't get the attention it deserves. Of course, October has other important causes - such as Anti-Bullying and Breast Cancer Awareness - but I also think that it is an issue that we are uncomfortable discussing. It often isn't until an individual has lost her/his life because of it or until a high-profile celebrity makes the headlines because of a domestic violent incident that it captures our attention. Even though these tragic stories grab our interest for a short period of time, I Shame, Secrecy and Stigma believe it is hard to look deeper into the topic of Domestic Violence because although we have made strides in its awareness due to the ongoing work of countless individuals and organizations, Domestic Violence remains an issue that is shrouded in shame, secrecy and stigma. Why does this continue to be the case? First of all, there are many long-held m...

* In light of the recent news headlines regarding Domestic Violence and well-known athletes, and with the hope of shedding a bit more understanding into the victim's mindset, I offer this blog. In October, three causes all deserve our attention - Breast Cancer Awareness, Anti-Bullying Awareness, and Domestic Violence Awareness.  It strikes me that all three share a common theme - individuals are fighting for their lives. So, I think it is fitting that they share the attention collectively.  Hopefully, each one will shine a light onto the importance of the others. Over twenty years ago, I interned at a Battered Women's Center in the Bay Area of Northern California.  This was part of my pre-degree hours required to obtain my Masters in Psychology with an emphasis in Marriage, Family and Child Counseling. Because I knew I wanted to specialize in the areas of abuse and trauma, I eagerly anticipated this learning experience.  Before I could begin interning at the Sh...