Showing posts from 2012

Newtown - A Moment Of Silence...A Time To Be Still

Psalm 46:10   Be still...and know that I am God. Today marks one week since the horrifying events at Sandy Brook Elementary School.  As we each take time to remember all the victims, their families, their loved ones, their friends and the entire community with a moment of silence, I encourage each one of us to be still. There have been so many voices this past week. We are all desperately grappling with how to make sense out of something that does not make sense. Experts as well as a myriad of solicited and unsolicited spokespersons are attempting to sort and sift through the emotional rubble in a hopeful attempt to figure out reasonable sensible solutions, or if there is possibly a pathway that will lead us to a safer way of being. In the fury of it all, sometimes our minds begin to spin with all the noise around us. Today, in remembrance of the precious beings who were taken from us, calm your mind. As you do so, consider the verse from Psalm 46:10... Be still.

When our bodies betray us...

When our bodies betray us...How to break through the emotional bonds of chronic illnesses.

A Gentleman and A Warrior - A Veteran's Day Tribute

Three years ago, I had a relatively brief but incredibly inspiring conversation with a stranger who instantly became my hero .I was at the San Diego, CA Airport waiting for a flight when the only seat available in the overly-crowded waiting area was next to a young, tall, impeccably suited Marine. I slowly walked over looking to see if perhaps a buddy or two was with him before asking the Private if the chair was taken.  He politely answered, "No, mam, it is  not. Please sit down." After arranging my coat, computer case, and purse, I eased back into the black and metal seat. I glanced over at the young man next to me.  He was leaning forward with his elbows resting on his knees and his long fingers were carefully nestling his hat. He was staring down at the floor for long periods of time, and then he glanced upward when a flight attendant's voice rang over the intercom. Risking that I might be interrupting his thoughts but wanting to say something to this brave soldier,

Breast Cancer Survivor Traded in her Dusting Rags for Dancing Shoes!

Terry Peterson, age 65 and a 20 year breast cancer survivor, recently created, directed, and performed in the 2015 Santa Cruz Follies’ annual musical production - Those Were The Days. When asked how she views her long-term wellness, she is quick to respond.  “My doctor said that my attitude about getting well was 50% of my healing.  There came a time in my treatment plan when I was sick and tired of being sick and tired.                                          So, I traded in my dusting rags for dancing shoes." Terry’s journey with breast cancer began when she was just 45 years old.  After a second opinion confirmed that a lump in her right breast had changed, Terry received her biopsy results September 15, 1995.  She indeed had stage three breast cancer with seven of fourteen lymph nodes testing positive. After a lumpectomy, Terry completed an aggressive and grueling year of treatment:  four months of chemotherapy, five and one-half weeks of radiation, and then anoth

Amanda Todd - Another Tragic Loss...Enough Is Enough!!

Amanda Todd - Another Tragic Loss...Enough Is Enough!

Domestic Violence Awareness Month -Why Do Victims Stay?

* In light of the recent news headlines regarding Domestic Violence and well-known athletes, and with the hope of shedding a bit more understanding into the victim's mindset, I offer this blog. In October, three causes all deserve our attention - Breast Cancer Awareness, Anti-Bullying Awareness, and Domestic Violence Awareness.  It strikes me that all three share a common theme - individuals are fighting for their lives. So, I think it is fitting that they share the attention collectively.  Hopefully, each one will shine a light onto the importance of the others. Over twenty years ago, I interned at a Battered Women's Center in the Bay Area of Northern California.  This was part of my pre-degree hours required to obtain my Masters in Psychology with an emphasis in Marriage, Family and Child Counseling. Because I knew I wanted to specialize in the areas of abuse and trauma, I eagerly anticipated this learning experience.  Before I could begin interning at the Shelter or at

September 11th Need Not Define Us...But Refine Us

Although every year since the attacks of 9/11 have brought us through the grieving process and helped us to reach stronger levels of healing, the ceremonies at last year's tenth anniversary seemed to move us into a truly significant realm - one where we were no longer  defined by the events...but refined by them. Making that critical transition is indeed a painful and difficult process, but it is one that will continue to serve us well, if we continue to embrace it.  When we were horrifically betrayed in 2001, our political, economical, social, financial, and of course, relational foundations were pulled out from under us.  Our lives were forever re-landscaped, and hundreds of thousands of citizens were sentenced to years of immeasurable heartache and loss. Most of us tried desperately to make sense out of something that did not make sense   so that in the chaos of our confusion and in the prison walls of our powerlessness, we might be able to cling to some morsel of rationale o

"Hope Springs" Offers Hope For All Couples!

Last week, my husband and I saw an entertaining movie - "Hope Springs".  Before the movie started and as the people were pouring in, I noticed that the auditorium was filled with silver-haired bobs and shiny bald scalps.  Yes, the average age was probably mid to late seventies.  Soon, the lights dimmed, the music started, and the Seniors began soaking up the wonderful acting performances of Tommy Lee Jones and Meryl Streep. What surprised me is that this movie has a strong message, not just for the those in their Golden Years, but for every couple! Throughout the movie, there were bursts of laughter and yet there were moments when I saw several audience members take out a Kleenex and catch a tear or two. There were uneasy scenes when couples in the audience pulled apart from one another (just as the characters did in the movie) and there were times when partners snuggled closer together, again mirroring the emotion displayed on the screen. As the movie continued, the  mess

Taking Away the Power from the Aurora Betrayer and Reclaiming Our Own

I am saddened and sickened by the massacre that took place in Aurora, Colorado.  My heart goes out to all the victims and to their families and friends. As the days go by, most of us get on with our routines and we look forward to the goodness in others and in the day in front of us.   Tragically, the relatives of the loved ones killed or injured in the shootings as well as the caring community in Aurora have had their lives forever re-landscaped by this horrific event.  They will continue to spend the ensuing days, months, and even years working through their losses. Although I understand the need for the media to educate and inform the public as to the identity and to the persona of the shooter, I tremble each time I hear his name and see his photo. Each and every time his dastardly act is mentioned, the betrayal he inflicted on innocents receives attention and thus contributes to his infamous notoriety. Each and every time his name is spoken and his photo is shown, we (perhaps un

Mother's Day Can Be A Hard Day ~ And A Healing Day

Millions of individuals are celebrating Mother's Day with yummy BBQ's, exquisite brunches, specialty restaurant dining,lovely cards, thoughtful gifts,and bouquets of flowers.However, there are countless others who struggle to get through this difficult day.    It is something we don't often talk about, we are afraid to admit, and we suffer silently wishing the day would pass quickly.  ~ Quiet Suffering ~ Release your pain and its hold on you. There are no words that adequately describe the pain of a mother who abandons or rejects her children, who neglects or abuses or harms them in any way, or who violates their trust, love, and need for her. And it is extremely injurious for others whose mothers did not protect them from outside injustices or provide safety from familial betrayals. For those of you who are suffering today, I want you to know that you are not alone. I want you to know that you have every right to feel angry, sad, and bitter. I want you to know t