How Courage Opened the Door to JOY
How Courage Opened the Door to JOY
Introduction
Have you ever wanted to make a change in your life?
Have you ever said you were going to change and then nothing ever happened?
Have you wondered what might be holding you back?
As I share my insights in today’s blog, I hope you will discover as I did that although change is never easy, its genesis lies within us - COURAGE
Background
Almost two years ago, a deeply beloved member of our family suddenly passed away. I have experienced other losses in my life. But this one magnified the fragility of life and its stark brevity. As I moved through my grief, I made a promise to myself – I was intentionally going to seek out JOY.
In order to do that, it would require Courage. Courage to change. Courage to be vulnerable.
Courage to Change
All of my adult life I have dedicated myself to helping others, first as teacher and then as a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. I loved both of these careers! However, both were professions that required high levels of intense commitment. And, they were often very serious in nature. Afterall, the wellbeing of others was in my hands.
But if I was going to keep my promise of seeking JOY, I needed to be courageous. What would that require of me?
First, I began asking myself what I was willing to let go of. After months of reflection, I decided to close my private therapy practice. This was hard! I loved my clients! I loved being a part of their growth, healing, and transformational journeys! And this is who I was – a therapist! But I knew if I truly desired a change in my life, I had to step away from current roles and responsibilities in order to create room for new opportunities and growth. I had let go of the familiar heaviness within my core in order to embrace an unfamiliar but a lighter way of being.
Being courageous also required that I translate my desires into actionable behaviors. I gave myself a year to plan and prepare for closing my therapy practice. I was intentional about every session with every client and our remaining time together. As the time for termination drew near, I was ready and I believed they were as well.
Don’t get me wrong, it was extremely difficult! On my wrist, I wore a bracelet that said “Courageous” on the band. Every time I began doubting myself as I sat across from a client who had placed her life and her trust in me, I glanced down at the words “Courageous” and took in a deep breath. I silently rehearsed, “Seeking JOY or making any change is not easy. I must be brave.”
Three months have passed since I saw my last clients. I miss them. And yet, I can feel a shift within me. The lightness I had longed for is filling in the space where heaviness resided for so long. At times, it still feels odd. A little uncomfortable. But I remember my promise and my mind replays these words:
The Courage to Change grows and strengthens as we do.
Questions for You
Dear Reader,
Are you seeking a change in your life?
If so, what are you willing to let go of?
What actions steps are you will you commit to making and taking?
This is important. Your Courage to Change is within you. Waiting for you.
Just for a moment, pause and imagine. What doors will open if you embrace its presence?
Courage to be Vulernable
Over the past several years, the word “vulnerable” has received a lot of attention. Researcher and author Dr. Brene’ Brown defines vulnerability as feelings of “risk, emotional exposure, and uncertainty”.
When I made my promise to myself to seek JOY, I felt all three of those feelings! Yikes! What did I just do? This meant I might have to step outside of my comfort zone!
What if I took a risk and failed? What if I put myself out there emotionally and people shamed me? And, was I willing to let go of not being in control of the outcome – of living in uncertainty? No! Not really!
But I leaned into Courage. I could feel it. As I thought about other challenges in my life and how I moved through them, I reminded myself Courage was always there. I just didn’t always recognize its presence. So, I remained open to new possibilities and growth.
Then one year ago, I did something I NEVER thought I would EVER do. I entered the Ms. Senior California Pageant 2024! Talk about risk, emotional exposure, and uncertainty!
For three months after my application was accepted, I worked hard preparing for the Pageant. But what I also noticed during that time was how much fun I was having. I loved buying elegant dresses and searching for lovely matching jewelry and shoes. For my talent, I wrote a beautiful poem - Where Is You Beauty? - and rehearsed it almost every day. But participating in the Pageant held deeper meaning for me and enhanced my JOY – honoring Senior Women!
I didn’t win the 2024 Pageant. However, I felt so much JOY from my experience last year that I applied and competed in Ms. Senior California Pageant 2025! I took stock of critical lessons learned from participating in 2024, and I made significant changes in every category of competition. And, I won! JOY radiated within me as I honored Senior Women! And, I was proud of my SELF!
MS. Senior California Pageant 2025
Yes, there were lingering feelings of risk, emotional exposure, and uncertainty. But Courage deepened and took residence within me. As the sparkling silver crown was placed on my head and I held a gorgeous bouquet of white flowers in my arms, I replayed these words in my mind:
The Courage to be Vulnerable grows and strengthens as we do.
Questions for YOU
Dear Reader,
Are you afraid of making a change?
Are you worried about failing?
Are you frightened of people making fun of you or that you may not be in control?
This is important. The Courage to be Vulnerable is within you. Waiting for you.
Just for a moment, pause and imagine. Who will you become if you open yourself up to it?
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